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Join us at the Slacker Holiday Gift Market

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Join us at the Slacker Holiday Gift Market

Pretty please - Vol. 31

Digital Future Magazine
Dec 15, 2021
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Join us at the Slacker Holiday Gift Market

digitalfuturemagazine.substack.com

Another day, another dollar. We will have a small booth at the Slacker Holiday Gift Market this Saturday, December 18th. You can find all the details on the flyer below.

We will be set up near the food trucks and will have a limited amount of photo books and merchandise. We’ll also have a curated bookshelf that will make excellent gifts for family, friends and loved ones.

We're still looking for contributors, so please get in touch with us if you'd like to pitch us an idea!

@digitalfuturemag

* * *

Culture Corner

Is Coffee Before Workouts Good or Bad? inverse
Sam Reiss the GOAT. This is always something I ponder as I get into my car for the gym at the crisp hour of 6:45 am.

The Elite Heat of Blackbird Spyplane newyorker
One of the only newsletters I’ve read consistently since the first post. Jonah Weiner has an interesting literary voice that toes the line between satire and completely serious narcissism and it seems to be a deliberate commentary on online influencer speak.

Matthew Macfayden on Succession’s season 3 finale gq
Tom is and has been one of my favorite characters since starting the show. Somewhat an outsider of the insiders, he feels the most emotionally relatable alongside cousin Greg. This development this season has been heartbreaking at times but it paid off in an insanely gratifying way in the end. I think Matthew Macfayden’s approach to Tom compared to his coworkers (see: Jeremey Strong’s The New Yorker profile) is more laid back and the ease and levity translate to his performance.

Kentucky Tornados, Money Competition for Teachers: One Weekend in Late Capitalist America teenvogue
Rest in peace to all the workers who died at the Amazon warehouse in Illinois and the candle factory in Kentucky.

The Day My Coworkers and I Chose Our Survival Over Our Supervisor jacobin
Imagine a plane is flown into the building you work in and your boss tells you to stay put.

Luann De Lesseps Dined and Dashed nymag
Going out for a quick smoke, the oldest trick in the book.

* * *

Review Section

And Just Like That - Episodes 1 and 2

Reviews are in and unfortunately, fans and critics alike agree that the Sex and the City reboot is bad. Not awful, but definitely bad! The absence of Samantha Jones is a character in and of itself and the explanation we are given for the dissolution of her longtime friendship with the girls is flimsy. Miranda is a liberal terrorist, Charlotte cannot stop weeping, and Carrie is now a podcaster. We’re subjected to jokes about “gender roles and cinnamon rolls” and, for some reason, Miranda is now physically unable to refrain from both drinking before 11 AM and frantically espousing her woke bona fides. Many of the plot points are bizzaro: Carrie has a conversation with her non-binary boss and podcast co-host, Che Diaz, during which they produce a bowl from their pocket and begin fully toking inside an elevator while telling Carrie to ‘step (her) pussy up’, Charlotte and Lily exchange an awkwardly delivered attempt at adoption humor, and Miranda and Steve’s teenage son Brady and his girlfriend cannot stop fucking like rabbits. The Uncanny Valley feeling persists through the entire first episode, which ends with the dramatic death of Mr. Big via stationary bike. (Would be remiss not to mention the Chris Noth Peloton ad. Ryan Reynolds' reign of terror continues.) Carrie comes home from Lily’s piano recital to find Big slumped over on the floor of the shower clutching his chest. Does she attempt to administer CPR? No. Does she call 911? No. Instead, she gasps and stares in shock before dramatically running to him and holding him as he dies in her arms, a move which a UCLA cardiologist confirmed likely cost Big his life.  

The second episode is devoted to Big’s funeral and the fallout of his death. Carrie enlists the help of two power suit clad lesbians to put together a tasteful funeral in a stark white art gallery and Miranda (aptly nicknamed ‘Ol Chablis Hobbes by Sexy Unique Podcast co-hosts Lara Schoenals and Carey O’Donnell) bullies an event bartender into serving her a shot before delivering a slam poetry-esque eulogy on Carrie’s behalf that included the phrase “Big hole”. It’s revealed that the beautiful floral arrangement cascading over Big’s tomb was accompanied by a note and was a gift from London Lady herself. Once again, I refuse to believe Samantha Jones wouldn’t have at the very least called. 

Anyway, RIP John Preston! As far as the reboot goes, much like icon Lexi Featherston I am left asking myself, “What ever happened to FUN?”

-S

* * *

Tweet Time

I’ve added a few extras and I’m presenting without context.

Twitter avatar for @cuhhrissee
CHRISY 🦦 @cuhhrissee
fury covering power trip riley gale forever
7:50 AM ∙ Dec 13, 2021
914Likes245Retweets
Twitter avatar for @beeragon
Cressa Maeve Beer @beeragon
Anne Rice on Trans people. Rest well, Queen of the Damned, a generation of queer goths thanks you.
Image
Image
2:53 PM ∙ Dec 12, 2021
68,185Likes13,866Retweets
Twitter avatar for @successionreact
succession clips and reaction videos @successionreact
succession clip greg hirsch asks tom wambsgans “how’d you get shiv? she’s out of your league.” tom responds “I’ll tell you. I got a dick the size of a red sequoia and I fuck like a bullet train. okay? satisfied?”, greg demands “prove it” leaving tom questioning “what?”
12:27 AM ∙ Nov 30, 2021
2,714Likes317Retweets
Twitter avatar for @thedailybeast
The Daily Beast @thedailybeast
Donald Trump, answering phone call from 7-year-old on Christmas Eve: "Are you still a believer in Santa? Because at seven it's marginal, right?"
1:26 AM ∙ Dec 25, 2018
79,621Likes24,728Retweets
Twitter avatar for @jackies_backie
J*ckie @jackies_backie
New sex and the city: CARRIE: Hold on… what da freak is non-binary :/ THE OTHER GIRLS: It’s basically like… when you’re vaping in a pussy hat 😏
9:44 PM ∙ Dec 12, 2021
5,531Likes203Retweets

* * *

Here are some things I'm watching on eBay

(If you have any magazines you'd like to sell, I'm buyin’. I'm specifically interested in anything printed before the 90s. Send me an email or DM me on Instagram)

Vintage Union Farmer’s ‘Dog Pound’ tee

Buffalo Zine Issue 9 - Donatella Versace cover

Nova Magazine - Kate Moss issue

* * *

That’s it for this week! Peace and love.

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